I usually cringe when someone says “my philosophy is …,” because they typically follow it up with something along the line of “to never leave the house without breakfast”. People seem to throw the word “philosophy” around when talking about their personal preferences or the way they do things. Such a use of the word is trivial, and, some would argue, wrong. However, philosophy can be a way of living life; it can be a set of rules and beliefs that define one’s actions. It is important to differentiate this approach from more inconsequential uses of the term; a philosophy of life encompasses how one should live or what outlook one should adopt, rather than a specific belief about one activity or a narrow aspect of one’s life.

One philosophy of life, stoicism, is particularly well known these days. Stoicism includes perspectives on ethics, logic, philosophy of language and ontology. Outside of philosophical circles, the school of thought is associated more closely with the ability to control one’s emotions and remain calm. If you type stoicism into Google, the first definition that shows up is “the endurance of pain or hardship without the display of feelings and without complaint.” While this is not an exhaustive definition of the philosophical movement behind the name, the idea of resisting strong emotions and not being controlled by one’s temperament is central to stoicism.

In the last few years, there has been a surge of books, blogs and general discussion about stoicism, especially about its applicability in the 21st century. The revitalization of this ancient school of thought may seem surprising, but there are valuable teachings that can actually help people better navigate their busy lifestyles. Some stoic beliefs have even been incorporated into Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, known as CBT. Albert Elis and Aaron Beck — who are often seen as the founding fathers of CBT — are said to have been inspired by Epictetus and other stoics.

One stoic idea easily identified in CBT is acceptance — not in the form of giving up or being apathetic, but rather understanding that once something is out of one’s control, it should no longer lead to distress or other negative emotions. This approach, when implemented in therapy, can help ease anxiety about uncontrollable circumstances and help people move on from grief.

Furthermore, the concept of healthy passions — eupatheiai — resembles the idea that there are healthy and unhealthy emotions, which is prevalent in Elis’ psychotherapeutic approach.

I by no means intend to say that going to therapy makes one a stoic — that would be an utterly reductionist approach. Stoicism is not therapy, but rather an entire lifestyle. To be a stoic, it isn’t sufficient to pick and choose several tenets and introduce them into one’s everyday life. Becoming a stoic entails an entire restructuring of one’s belief system, worldview and relationships with others, which requires a high level of commitment.

As someone who looks skeptically upon many self-help books, I am in no position to objectively assess modern day guides to stoicism. However, perhaps cherry-picking certain aspects of stoicism can help us cope with the fact pace of life which is very common these days. With so many things happening around us, many of which are likely to heighten our anxiety, perhaps it would be best to only focus on what we can truly control. Again, one should not, from an academic perspective, reduce stoicism to life advice, but maybe using bits and pieces of the stoic ideology is appropriate enough when it comes to improving one’s mental health. And perhaps, this may inspire people to finally learn to use the phrase “my philosophy is” in the way it is intended to be used.